Category Archives: Animalia

The Orange Dog

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERAWe got Augie on October 23rd, 2012. It took me since we got Pickle (April of 2011) to convince Nitram that a lone dog is a lonely dog. It took Pickle and Augie five days (I thought it would be much longer) to become inseparable.

This is Day 3:

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This is Day 5:

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This is about 6 weeks later:

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Augie is a Boxer/Whippet/Pit Bull mix — about half Boxer for the most part. When we got her from a local rescue, she was 30 pounds and still suffering from mange. She looked to be about 5 years old, with a permanent worry in her face.

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Two months later she was almost 40 pounds and  fit, and one of the happiest dogs I’ve ever seen. Dr Fitch had said Augie was barely 2 years old (good teeth!) and would “fill out.” She sure did. We thought we were getting a dog only a few pounds larger than Pickle, and ended up with a 40-pound galoot who leaves muddy footprints, sand, grass, debris, and general awesomeness everywhere she goes.

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Augie also leaves farts everywhere she goes. They’re horrifying, room-clearing. I looked up Boxers and it turns out that they unfortunately have a high incidence of death by flatulence — their human’s death, that is. I’ve had to keep a bottle of natural organic lavender air freshener on the bedside table so I don’t suffocate in my sleep. I found out that Boxers also have the longest tongues of any dog, so that explains that humongous piece of sliced ham hanging about 18 inches out the side of her mouth.

We’ve taken to calling Augie the Orange Dog and Pickle the White Dog when we don’t want them to know we’re talking about them. It’s still working — they haven’t  figured out their colors yet.

I asked Nitram not too long ago if after not wanting another dog, could he ever imagine living without Augie.

He said, “No way.”

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I Am a Singularity

That’s right. A singularity. Look it up.

Not only is there just one of me, but I am unique in all other ways as well. And, there is only one of my name, as in “Pickle.” NOT “Pickles.” Just “Pickle.” P-i-c-k-l-e. Again: P-i-c-k-l-e-NO S.

Geddit?You’d better.

When people say, “Pickles?” Mom and Dad often wish they hadn’t named me Pickle. They smile and say (usually it takes more than once to get it across), “No, it’s Pickle,” while in their heads thoughts like, Do you see more than one dog here? and PickLLLL! and Just one fucking Pickle, and Asshole race around as their smiles stretch a bit thin. It’s a long story, but my name actually means something other than the sound “pick-le.” It certainly does not mean “pickles.”

I am not a plurality; I am, as I said, a singularity. After this, you shouldn’t be making a mistake about that or about my name.

Now that that’s settled, it’s blankie time.

~Pickle

Batfink

Free-tailed Bat, copyright 2011 Leonardo Ancillotto. All Rights Reserved.

Disclaimer: This applies to North American New England bats; if anyone very knowledgeable about bats of the world would like to comment and add advice, please do.

If a bat gets into your house, here is what to do:

This almost always happens at night, so try to isolate the bat in one room by turning the lights off or low in that room, and turning the lights on or bright in other rooms. Bats are not attracted to light. To isolate the room, close the doors very slowly and very carefully. This can take some constant effort because the bat will usually be swooping and dive-bombing throughout the house. Be very careful not to slam doors or barriers — you do not want a squished little bat.

I tend to sort of crawl around on the floor while doing this, to avoid the bat’s flight path. No, they are not going to dive for your hair or face — but they do swoop and dive, and if your hair or face is in the way, oh well.

Once the bat is isolated in one room, open a window — make sure the screen is up and open, preferably as you are opening the window; you don’t want the bat crashing into the screen repeatedly.

If the bat doesn’t immediately fly right out the window, turn the lights off completely, and it should head right out.

Done.

Okay, so that’s what to do. Here is what not to do:

Scream and run around like a nutter, flapping your arms.

Grab a pillowcase or towel or other item to trap the bat in. Bad idea. Hurts the bat, may hurt you.

So there it is, that’s about it. Simple.

Bats are largely beneficial creatures and they want to be in your house even less than you want them to be there. Be good to the bats and ease them out. Remember, “Don’t panic.”

Also, please see Bat World Sanctuary‘s page on What to do if You’ve Found a Bat.